Jim Fitzpatrick: Morons, Hail Your King

"What it says is that drivers should remember they have to concentrate and they shouldn't be distracted either by passengers, by loud music, by reading a map, or using a mobile phone or by smoking.

If you're lighting up with one hand and have a fag in the other hand then obviously you've not got any hands on the wheel.

So I think what we're saying is concentration is very important in the prevention of accidents."

This man is a dunce, and would clearly be better able to serve the country as a footstool to help old age pensioners get tins of soup down from high places. He'd probably be really bad at it and manage to kill off a few of the old dears and do a bit for the pension crisis that Labour like to keep quiet about.

You have to admire his childlike perspective on the world though, where people need two hands to light a tab, presumably waving them around wildy like a demented double windmill until by some happy chance the flame and paper finally meet. I am also quite impressed to see he can at least count to two, which I assume is double that which the Scots cunt who claims to run the country now can manage.

Would you like to know what the actual biggest safety risk on British roads is? The fact that single braincelled organisms like this are able to hold a driving license, never mind a position of responsibility in road safety. Is he using both hands to change gears? Pressing the clutch pedal with a stick because he's run out of feet? The people should be told.


EDIT: I missed this link the first time round. Skip to about 25s in, and the ever giving Mr. Fitpatrick will advise you incorrectly on driving position and cigarette lighting process. Time to fuel up the elephant gun.