Peter Vs The EnviroMentalists

Global warming. Pointing out that I don't blindly accept the theory of global warming as true has lead to some odd results at times. The most obvious example is my being called a fascist several times. Which makes a lot of sense really - expressing a freely held contrary opinion to the average Ecobot can often enrage them. How dare I not follow their beliefs? There should be a law against it. Fuck it, he's a fascist wanker anyway (to be fair, 50% of that last assumption is correct).

I could bitch about the Envirocunts all day. In fact I did once, but I got sacked and that's not what I'm here for today. So I'll just say that I dislike people who try to force their opinion onto me and often force my pint glass into them in return. Into this box go the religious, Ecotwats and a shedload of other retards. Let's leave it at that.

So I don't accept global warming as fact. It might be true, I don't know. But fuck it, I've dedicated about eight seconds' thought to the issue and solved it. Now the little pricks can start worrying about global coldening, which I can also solve (for a fee this time).

Have you ever left your fridge open for a week by mistake? I have. Your kitchen gets cold. Cold as fuck, actually. I opened the window and it got warmer. Now my Physics background tells me that the cold air escaped to the outside. Therefore, I cooled the world down by a tiny bit.

Here's the plan - we all leave our fridges open for an entire 24 hours. Fair enough, it'll cost us all a bit extra in electricity but we could easily cool the planet by two or three degrees, maybe even six or so. If we work together we could beat this thing, for once and for all. International Winners Against Nasty Climates Day is June the 30th. Let us unite and kick climate change to the kerb, just by leaving our fridge doors open. Hell, run your A/C for the entire 24 hours if you want (but try not to catch a cold, it's not worth it).

Email your friends, email your enemies and email that guy you slept with in a night-club toilet one time when you were on LSD and thought I was in an owl sanctuary. Spread the message, spread the word - International Winners Against Nasty Climates Day. Live it, for life.

POP NOTE: Every time I see a Toyota Prius on the road, I complete my journey without changing out of first gear, so don't think that's going to help solve the problem. Leave your fridge door open instead and actually contribute for once, you fucking prick.