WWJD

I decided not to read my emails for a week and I've obviously been going through too many today, because I just saw a car with the registration V142 GRA and got stuck wondering why it wasn't attached to a Porsche Boxster or a Corvette and being driven by an old guy.

One email stood out, sent from a contact lurking deep within the bowels of England's home-grown fundies. It seems that I skimmed the Bible, because I obviously missed the elventh commandment:
"Though shalt taketh a pop the Muzzies whenever though getteth das chance."

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Subject: Mosque for London Olympics

Dear All,

Take a second to cast your vote in the Evening Standard online poll
to determine public opinion about whether a mega mosque should be
build for the Olympics.

The vote so far is 62% in favour. It looks like the Muslim
community is casting its vote in droves, and as usual the Christians
are burying their head in the sand.

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Yeah, I have a few comments here.

Take a second to cast your vote
No.

In the Evening Standard online poll
The Evening Standard? I thought that cunt Blair ran the country. This is even worse than I imagined. And people are taking online polls seriously now? I always figured they were intended as jokes.

whether a mega mosque should be build for the Olympics
It's spelt built. I bet you were reading up on Creationism during English lessons, weren't you?

It looks like the Muslim community is casting its vote in droves
The correct collective noun for "Muslim community" is Lalalalalalas, you thick fuck. Also, the sentence doesn't scan. Did you skip Bible School altogether?

and as usual the Christians are burying their head in the sand
That's one way to turn the other cheek, although it seems to still allow you to talk. By the way, many Christians have many heads, a single Christian (in this case, you) is a dick head. If only you'd spent less time being buggered by Father O'Phile (no relation) at Bible Camp...

I believe that God put Christians on this Earth to piss off the sane people. I believe that the religion of peace and love was founded purely to spread bile and venom across the world. I believe that if Jesus had been alive, he would have either voted in favour of a mosque being built, or not given a fuck either way (my personal leanings).

The only building Jesus would have voted against would surely be a Synagogue, unless he's forgotten about that whole crucifixion thing by now. And even then, he could just smite the shit out of it once it was built, which would be much cooler.

So, Christians. I suggest you vote for the mosque then pray for some hardcore smiting on those Godless fuckers. After all, WWJD?